When you learn about what introversion is, it can feel like someone is watching your life. You do enjoy being alone. You despise making superficial small conversation. Spending too much time mingling with other people drains you, makes you cranky, and can even make you physically ill (a.k.a. the introvert hangover).
However, other features of introversion do not appeal to you. You have a large number of pals. You take pleasure in meeting new individuals. Even though you prefer profound talk, you may sometimes make frivolous chitchat.
So, are you an introvert?
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What Is an ‘Extroverted’ Introvert?
Here comes the “extroverted” introvert.
Many names have been given to the extroverted introvert. Some refer to it as a “outgoing introvert” or a “social introvert.” Others contend that this personality type symbolizes ambiversion, which is a mix of introversion and extroversion.
So, what exactly does “extroverted introvert” mean?
The important thing to realize about introversion is that it is not an all-or-nothing personality trait. Carl Jung, the prominent psychiatrist who coined the term “introversion/extroversion,” even stated that there is no such thing as a “pure” introvert or extrovert. Really, depending on the circumstances, our goals, and our energy levels, we all act introverted at times and extroverted at others.
So, rather than considering ourselves to be pure introverts or extroverts, we should consider ourselves to be somewhere on the introversion/extroversion spectrum. Some of us will fall closer to the extremes, indicating that we are either very introverted or very outgoing. Most of us will fall somewhere in the middle, exhibiting traits of both introversion and extroversion.
If you consider yourself an extroverted introvert, you’re certainly an introvert at heart — but you may be more outgoing than other introverts since your personality is more in the middle of the spectrum.
Signs You’re an ‘Extroverted Introvert’
1. Your energy level is closely tied to your environment.
You are aware of your surroundings. It is important to you how your environment seems, what type of music is playing, how many people are present, the noise level, and so on. The atmosphere of a place can either excite or drain you, depending on your tastes. A loud rock concert in a large stadium can be daunting, yet an intimate acoustic set at your favorite club can be relaxing.
2. You find people to be both intriguing and exhausting.
Are there people watching? Yes. Meeting new people and learning about their lives? Fascinating. Do you spend practically every night with your friends? There is no way. Outgoing introverts like meeting new people but have a limited tolerance for socializing. After a hard day at work or a busy weekend, you may feel the need to escape and recharge by spending time alone or with only one other person.
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3. Certain people and interactions drain you while others recharge you.
You have a few buddies with whom you could spend an eternity. You never seem to run out of topics to discuss. It’s simple to be with them. You really feel better after spending time with them, rather than depleted, and you appear quite outgoing in their presence. Other people rapidly tire or bore you, and you need to get away as soon as possible. Being alone is preferable to settling for second-rate company for you.
4. You can be charming but also deeply introspective and reflective.
while it’s expected of you, such as at your child’s parent-teacher conference or while meeting a new employee, you can make small conversation. You’re also aware that small talk can lead to more in-depth, honest dialogue. People feel at ease around you because you read people well and have a talent for encouraging others to chat and open up about themselves. When you’re out with pals, you can be the person who makes sure everyone has a nice time. Most others, however, are unaware of how “in your head” you are. Despite your outward appearance of being gregarious and lighthearted, your mind is constantly working behind the scenes.
5. When you feel rested and recharged, you reach out to others.
You’re frequently the one who plans social gatherings for others. Playing host is perfect for the extroverted introvert because it allows you to spend time with people on your terms. When you run out of energy, you’re out, and all you want to do is cocoon at home, like a true introvert.
6. You need time to warm up in social situations.
Your first impression frequently betrays your true personality. You come out as calm and restrained at first. However, once you feel at ease around the person, you will have no trouble conversing. No, you won’t tell someone you’ve just met your entire life story or share your insecurities, but you will reveal sensitive facts once trust has been established. The more a person gets to know you, the more “extroverted” you appear.
7. It actually takes less energy to say what’s on your mind than to make small talk.
True extroverts rarely find themselves at a loss for words. They can easily shoot from the hip and chitchat about nearly any issue. Most introverts, though, disagree. Many introverts struggle with making small talk. They’d rather discuss huge concepts or interact in a genuine, honest way. This is especially true for outgoing introverts. It’s considerably easier for them to speak what’s on their mind than to pretend to have a lively conversation about the weather.
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8. You’re selectively social.
Although you enjoy relationships, you lack the energy to maintain a broad social network, unlike a true extrovert. Furthermore, you don’t connect with just anyone. So you make the most of your limited “people” energy by focusing it on a few tight ties.
9. You have no interest in trying to prove yourself in a crowd of strangers.
You are not someone who “works the room” at networking events or parties. You don’t need to draw a lot of attention to yourself in social situations, either. Yes, you recognize the importance of connecting with others, and you cherish those rare occasions when you come across a like-minded soul. But you know you’ll never be the most popular person in the room, and you’re fine with that.
10. You’re often confused for an extrovert.
Because you’re so outgoing, your friends and family don’t believe you’re an introvert. In fact, because you play the extrovert so well, it may have taken you a while to realize you’re an introvert. You’re constantly trying to explain your introversion and where you obtain your energy. Unfortunately, most people do not understand.
Remember that there is no incorrect way to be introverted. You can be outgoing while also being an introvert. It’s all about knowing your own needs and respecting your own style, even if that means being the star of the party one night and binge watching Netflix alone the next.